Eroticon, family update, From the heart, musings of pixie heart., Poly life, socail

Where in the world is Pixie Heart?

So, I have been posting and been around, but not really been ‘Around ‘of late. By that I mean I have been a little distant, a little distracted and felt a little bit outside of things. It’s not the nicest of feelings in the world, hell it’s horrid, but it has been kind of unavoidable really.

Why? I hear you cry. Well for one I have been rushed off my feet getting ready for Crufts. I’m not only working and teaching at the event this year, but all my dogs are there too. Don’t get me wrong it will be amazing, it is amazing every year, but it’s a planning and logistical nightmare. My boss has been epicly helpful and said that the babies can work on the stand. Basically, they are going to be strapped to different people in their carries and used to itemise people to come say hello. Which they are going to love as they love having chats and meeting people!

Then we come to the Elephants in the room. The big nasty that is Cancer has struck my family. My Uncle Keith had been struggling with chest infections and breathing difficulties for the last couple of months and his GP finally sent him for a chest x-ray. It sadly showed that he had tumours on his lungs. Well after scans and biopsies, it turns that the is nothing that can be done. It is a very aggressive cancer, it has spread, and he has a matter of months left. Then the is my mother’s cancer. We had thought she was going to beat it, but sadly not. The treatment is not working, the is nothing else that will work, and she has 3 to 6 months left. Now I may seem a little like I don’t really care about the fact they are both going to die. I do, I care very much, but I don’t see the point in sitting round wailing over it. Cancer is a bastered of an illness, it has taken a lot of people I love. It kills people slowly and painful. The best thing I can do is stay strong, keep going and be there when people need me. I have a life and people who need me to keep going, not crumble in to a ball and give up.

I have a lot of good things in pipe line. For all the stress it brings I am looking forward to crufts. I get to see my friends and shop for my dogs! Then the is Eroticon the weekend after. Lol I’m treating it as a holiday. No husband, babies, dogs, or house work for a weekend, in London, on my own! Truthfully, I’m terrified, but I’m going if it kills me. It will be good for me on so many levels, I just have keep moving the worry and doubts I have about myself and my abilities. Lol the Boss man said if I get through it on my own I get 20 reward stickers. The 5 days leading up to Eroticon I am teaching secturely dog handlers. which is always fun!

The changes I made with the help of the boss man at the start of the year have finally started to make them selves know so to speak. I’m happier and less stressed. I’m sleeping better and coping with some of the crap that life throws at me. my health, is getting better and I’ve stopped freaking out if I get a sniffle or cough. My writing schedule is working amazingly well and I’m making time to write more than I thought I would. It is amazing that by giving the boss man more control and having a heap more structure in my day, how much happier it makes me and the more settled I become. I had some say recently that they don’t know how I cope with being in something that is so high protocol and that the rules I have are too restrictive for me to feel truly happy. but it is in fact the other way around for me. Without the protocols, rule, and structure, I feel lost, anxious, and deeply unhappy. What I have would not work for may people, but it does work for me.

Well that turned in to a rant rumble, but hay hum!

Pixie x


Eroticon Meet and Greet.

So thought I would give this ago! as molly asked so nicely!

NAME (and Twitter if you have one)Pixie heart (@pixieheartblog). This is where I say, ‘I’m really bad with remembering names when I get stressed, so if I call you bob don’t deafened’. No really, I forget names of things to when stressed. I will quit often call the oven a washing machine or the dog a hamster.

What are you most looking forward to about Eroticon 2018?
Having a well-earned rest! Ha-ha! The 2 weeks leading up to it are extremely busy for me. I have crufts the weekend before and the 5 days leading up to it I will be teaching security dog handlers. (so, if you find me asleep in a corner just ignore me).
I’m really looking forward to meeting people and putting names to the faces. Learning new stuff, hearing people talk and being inspired.
The biggest thing for me though is the fact that I’m attending. I’m not going to lie, but I’m terrified. I have a lot of reasons not to go. Physical and mental health, tiny babies, husband, family, work, and home. But I’m going to do this, for me and to hell with the nagging voice in my head telling me I can’t or shouldn’t do this.
Oh, and little bear said I’m doing it for the goodie bag!

We are creating a play list of songs for the Friday Night Meet and Greet. Nominate one song that you would like us to add to the play list and tell us why you picked that song.
Ok so can I have 2, please???
Moon dance by Van Morrison or Superstation by Stevie Wonder.
Both epic tunes, that never fail to make me want to dance and get the party going.

What’s the first career you dreamed of having as a kid?
I wanted to be a Zoo Keeper or builder. Both things my mother frowned upon. I worked in fashion and then tv and the theatre. but then about 8 years ago I retrained and now sort of have my dream job, working with dogs.

Weirdest place you’ve ever gotten up to mischief (define ‘mischief’ however you like…)
Belimey! Well where to start. I live with a man who loves practical jokes and 3 girls who hardly ever take things seriously sooooo…. I personally think faking a panic attack after my marriage blessing, so I could get my groom alone for a quickie in the vestry pretty good fun. I Also, like are family girl dates lead to mischief, I mean going to ikea drunk, losing kitten, and finding he asleep in a wardrobe and getting band from said store pretty good going!
Tell us two truths and a lie about yourself.
I have 4 motorbikes called Eddie, Sukie, Fifi and the Duke.
I got kicked out of a secondary school for hanging a bully out a 2nd floor window.
I don’t have any tattoos or pricings

Complete the sentence: I want. More fluffy thing in the world!

Well that’s me!