From the heart, musings of pixie heart, Uncategorized, wicked wednesday

The search for bedtime stories, Mood boosting and Smiles!

When I saw this weeks wicked Wednesday prompt was all about spreading the love for other blogs and bloggers, well I got rather excited. I love spreading the love of things that make me happy. Maîtriser says, when I love something or someone, I turn in to a little cheerleader. Lol that must be why I always cheer about him and the girls quite so loudly! (well they are awesome!). So, I decided that I would spread the love for my favourite blogs, cos they are also awesome and so worthy of a pixie cheer!

So, the first blog that I want to shout and cheer about is the epic CandySnatchReviews. This lady is funny, smart and I love the way she writes. Her product reviews are detailed, thought out and you know she really tested them out. Her sinful Sunday pictures, are nothing short of breath-taking and her candysnatch chats are not only informative, but funny at the same time. Her post about taking a sexy selfie, has led to me taking selfies and texting them to the boss man at work! but the biggest reason I love her blog is that she is full of body positivity and conference, that is contagious. Being a girl with body image issues and living with two other girls who struggle with self-esteem, reading her post has started to undo some of the damage that has been done over the years.

Next up is the wonderful blog of Cara Thereon. Now this lady is funny, witty, clever and has a very positive out look on life. She is submissive, is in a ldr with her daddy, and it is a poly, open relationship, so she is kind of on my level. She writes some very sexy things, that have led to some lovely times with my head between kitten’s legs! Her stories have now become a favourite of ours as are bedtime story. Again, the boss man is happy for us to read her blog, as she I polite and respectful of others and loves how her and her Dom are together.
Next is the blog of the very funny and charming John Brownstone Now I’m going state at the start, the are two blogs of male dominates that I can follow and read. One is Sir beasty’s and the other is John Brownstone’s blog. His blog is full of musing of a dom, on his life with his baby girl, kalya Lords and on life in general. He seems to have a very refreshing take on things and everything seems to be met with humour and thoughtfulness. I mean he even says when he gets things wrong. the boss man lets as read and comment, cos he likes the banter and he’s style of treating other people’s submissive. (with respect and humour)

The next blog I want to shout about is one of my favours to sit and read when I need cheering up or my mood boosting, and that blog is the wonder of Floss does life. Or as my aunty may calls her, that jolly nice lass off the ProudToBeKinky Podcast. Floss writes some very hot erotic fiction, that again has become some of are best loved bedtime stories. But the thing I Adour is her musings on life. She can put in to words, things that I think and can’t put in to words. the boss man lets me read and follow this blog, as he thinks she is a very good kink portative role model and act in a ladylike manner.

Lastly, but not least Has to be Girl on the net.. Just a great blog, full of giggle, things to make you think and ponder. The writing found in this blog is nothing short of perfection and was one of the blogs that inspired me to start blogging. The boss man lets me follow her blog, as he likes her writing and her outlook on life.

I could go on, and on about some other blogs till the cows come home, but I would be here forever. The are some many amazing blogs out there, that teach, support, and inspire me. Since I start this blog a little under a year ago, I have learnt some much about blogging, from other bloggers and can’t wait to see what the coming year will be bring.

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

Wicked Wednesday!

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From the heart, musings of pixie heart, social, Uncategorized

Day 19 of the Submissive's Advent Calendar , by submissive guide – Seen but not heard.

Hello my lovely friends of the interweb! how are you this fine day? what have been up to? I myself  have been a very busy . I had an English lesion, breakfast with my boss, tidy and cleaned the spare room, waxed lyrical about jam, eaten jam, and loved my babies! I also tried to pic my little dog spidie up, all 3 kg of her and buggers my back, to the point I had to call Kitten to help me get off the floor and get my ciro to do a home visit. Turned out not to be my back but my hip popped out of line, ouchies later and now move, all be it looking like I have been kicked in the bum!

Anyway back to the task in hand , If I can stop thinking about jam . right todays focus was the saying ‘children should be seen and not heard’. the first activity was called Quiet Bells. The idea was to attach bells on to your person and to see how quietly you could move and see what you noticed. the second was called Quiet voice. the aim was to speak and act in a quiet calm manner as much as you could for the day . now I read todays activities to maîtriser at breakfast, and him being in a mood for testing me, decided that I could do both! (his in a grumpy cos his not allowed to go skiing)

So he adapted the quiet bells activity a little, I was allowed to wear one of leather collars today, that locks and has a bell on it! most of my collars have bells on them for the very reason of this activity or as maîtriser says , so he knows where I am and what I’m doing! I was also allowed to wear the little cuffs that we put bells on too! at first I was jingling all over the shop and it made me very a wear that I was stomping round the house and being a little clumsy and loud. So I tried taking small step and listened for the jingle, and it was less. strangle making the effort to make less noise while moving , left me feeling calmer. having bells on my cuffs meant I learnt how flipping much I move me hands around when I talk with my hands and how hard I can hit the keys on my laptop when typing. so I try to cut back on both of them, but it did mean sitting on my hands a lot!

For the quiet voice activity , well I really loved this. I have a form of autism , and one of the things I really struggle with is the tone and volume of my voice. So this task made me practice me tone and volume , and that is a really good thing! also by being a little quieter and more softly spoken meant that I used please and thank you more, smiled more and giggled rather than use my Wally laugh! maîtriser said he likes it when I talk , rather than shout, and I got an extra reward sticker today for being calmer and even more polite!

So today has been great fun and really made my think, so I cant wait to see what tomorrow brings!

Night all .

Pixie x x x x

social, Uncategorized, Writing comp

Something wicked this way comes…. The winner is…..

Well it’s finally here! I have to say a massive thank you to all the writers who took part and to are wonderful judges , for not only putting a lot of effort , but also putting up with my lack of focus and organisation. Life , family and babies have all been rather crazy and have left me stinking and sucking a lot!

So the winner is (Drum roll please) ……

Something Wicked This way Comes, By Floss (off the proudtobekinky podcast) – a wonderful story that hooked the judges from start to finish. Written with style and passion , it flows beautifully! Well Done Miss Floss.

Judges choice:

Sir Beasty – Deeping hall , by Cousin – Very well written , great attention to detail and fabulous to read.

John Brownstone – chilling me softly, Posy Churchgate.- Drew me in from the start and i was left wondering if the cat had transformed in to the mysteisous lover.

Mark Stienwachs – Something Wicked, by Floss. – beautiful story , that leaves you griped from start to finish.

Pixie’s Pick – Fallen Angle – A gem of a story that I loved reading. Thank you for sharing it with us all!

So that’s the winners, think we might do something for Valentines Day people!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

Ps – stories will be published in the morning!

From the heart, musings of pixie heart, Poly life, social, Uncategorized

Day 17 of the Submissive's advent calendar , by submissive guide – saying thank you.

So this time next week I will be getting ready for a massive family Christmas eve party. It is a family tradition that my daddy’s side of the family gather at my aunt’s house , eat drink and be merry. I used to love it, but since my nana passed away, I find it very hard. after the death of two of my dads sisters , it is almost to painful to go. they were the lynch pin in the family and without them are once close family has become fragmented. So I’m going , but it has left me feeling very strange.

Right enough whingeing on to today’s fun and games . the focus of today is saying thank you. It’s about think of who and what you are thankfully to have in your life , and saying thank you so they know how important they are and how much you appreciate them . the first activate was to take some time out and say a proper thank you to some one important in your life and tell them why they are so important to you. the second one was to make some home-made cards and use them to say thank you to people . I’m doing they first as I am feeling a little under the weather and I’m not sure I would give 100% to making card, wich is a shame as I love-making cards , and doing craft . especially with the girls., spread out on the kitchen table and a Podcast on . But the girls are with their blood family today, so I chose to do the first one.

As the girls are not here and cos I still feel poorly and low,  maîtriser sat a did this with me! (and I was allowed to have bat cat and poppins!) . I wrote a postcards for the girls , Aunty May, Uncle Fred, Emit, Big Steve and Sir Beasty. I also wrote down why I am thankful for maîtriser, and this is what I wrote.

Maîtriser, I am thankful to have you in my life. You have helped me take back my life back and rebuild myself. you have taught me that it is ok to be myself, to love myself and to take pride in everything that I do. thank you for making see that I need to take care of myself, to be my best and to be able to care for others. you have shown me that I have a great deal of strength and courage from freely submitting to you and by the level of control I have also freely given you. I want to say thanking for my collar, my wedding ring, my home , the girls that you bought in to my life and for the beautiful twin baby girls. After every thing I did to hurt myself and to hurt the people around me, you forgave me and showed me how to forgive myself, you trusted myself and to belive in my self. Thank you for pushing me and making me work as hard as I can to be the best me I can be. thank you for providing me with everything I need to be myself, to feel loved, cared about and safe. But lastly thank you for letting me love you and belong to you!

well I am now off to say a very special thank you too maîtriser!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

From the heart, Masturbation Monday, musings of pixie heart, Uncategorized

All good things….

I’ve been sat outside sirs house waiting for the last 15 minutes, knowing how much he hates tardiness , I’m always get to appointments and work early now. I would hate to disappoint him or let him down, but that’s not the reason I am early today. We have been apart, with no contact for the last 2 weeks. No were not 24/7 , but were not casual either. no I don’t have a collar nor are we exclusive, I mean we’ve not really put a label on what we have, not yet. I mean we have talked about collaring and where we see this , what ever it is going but not agreed on a solid future or putting things on a more formal footing. what I do know is that not being able to text him or speak to him or see for the last 2 weeks has left me with an ache in heart and sadness in my soul. So when he text last night saying he was back from his business trip and that he wanted to see me today at lunch time , so we could talk , but only if I was free. I jumped at the chance to see him and be near him. The fact that I had been meant to be working and having lunch with my sisters , well they could be put off and called in sick to , but i so needed to see him.

the fact is for some horrid self-doubting reason that I just can’t shake , I think this is not going to be a nice chat . Nope I have a feeling that I am going to be told that you don’t want to take it any farther and your going to send me away. I mean most of the time we’ve met it’s been at a bar and then we have gone back to your place, rather than my tiny little studio flat. we talk, and laugh, we play and screw. I’m treated with care and respect, I know you feel desire for me and that you enjoy using my body. You must know how much I’m in to you and what we do, maybe a little too much. have I started to feel more for you than you do for me. Do I want more than are casual informal fun. Am I feeling for you and been lying to both of us when I said I was happy with how things are.

Then It hits me like a punch to the chest and brings tears to my eyes. I so feel more than I thought and want more than we have, but I don’t know how to deal with these very new and extremely strange to me feelings. I don’t even know what I want . To be moved from casual fun to what? Kinky girlfriend? No, I want something more formal. I want rules, I want the discipline , the pain and to serve. I want to be owned, loved and controlled. But more than anything I want him to call me his, and nobody else’s, unless he wants me to share with someone. I just sit there and let it sink in slowly, washing over me in waves .

My phone suddenly starts sing at me, making me jump so much I hit my on the roof of my mini! With a shaking hand I rummage through my handbag , looking for me phone, desperate to shut off the offending noise. When I find the bloody thing I look to see who is calling, flashing on the screen are three letters that send my heart in to a nerves flutter, Sir. I slide the lock screen open ,  clear my throat and hit the answer button. I manage to squeak out ‘Hello’

It’s met with a deep chuckle and a ‘hello yourself’ followed by ‘you took your time answering, not misbehaving are you ?’

Why the hell the word ‘misbehaving ‘ should have any effect on me at all, is boned me . Yet every muscle in my lower half tenses , my breathing hitches in my throat and my nipples , instantly get hard. I stammer out a ‘no’ In a high pitch tone that I don’t recognise as me.

‘So are you actually going to come inside, or were you planning on staying in your car all afternoon?’ Shit, shit ,shit he’s seen me. Oh god what do I do now. As if reading my mind you add ‘ If you’re not on my front pouch, by the front door in less than 30 seconds I will come and drag you out the car’

‘okay , I’m coming already’ I say in a slightly less submissive tone than I would normally use. I’m a tad peeved that you sound way to relaxed and full of humour for this to be anything other than another play session or bout of stress relief. I shake myself , grad my bag from the passenger seat , and make to get out the car. Only now thinking my choice of summer dress and saddles is , possibly not the best thing to wear if someone is going to break things off with you. I mean I feel like ive made too much effort , I should have gone with jeans, t-shirt and trainers, then I would look so bad when I stop at the petrol station on the way home for ice-cream to help with a broken heart.

I’ve almost made it to your porch and front door before I realise that I’m really over thinking all this. More than likely this is just a booty call and that I’m going to have as much fun as you. breathe Kallie , just breathe and stop being so fucking stupid. It’s not going to be all bad , not what you want but at least it well feel good.  lost in thought again , I raise my hand to knock on the door , only for it to swing open  and I’m left knocking on his rather muscled , tanned chest covered in a light brown hair. I just stand their stock still staring at the wall of you that is in front of me. i hear your slow, deep chuckle as your arm go round me and pull me in to your chest for the biggest hug of my life . I breath in a big deep breath , that is full of your sent , lord you smell good, i have missed that smell so much. I breath out a long , deep sigh and let you take me by the hand and guide me in to the house.

You shut the door behind you with firm shove of you foot and I hear the key turn in the lock. I have only taken a few in to the coolness of the tiled hall , the butterflies are back in my tummy and I half heartedly try to figure out how easy I could run and crash through the pouch window and get in to the safety of my car. Lost in thought, I jump when your hands make contact with the bear skin of my shoulder and upper arms. Then your voice in a whisper in  my ear says ‘hush little one, calm down, it’s ok. Why don’t you put your bag down and slip your shoes, then go through to the lounge , while I get us some thing to drink. Go on make yourself comfortable little one’ and then his gone from my side .

I do as I’m told putting my bag on the hall table , slipping my feet out of my sandles and pad along the hall to the lounge, remarking to myself how cool the tiles fell under my bare feet. Once in the lounge I run my fingers across the smooth leather of the couch , and then turn and look out the window to your small garden, with its chairs and table, that would make a perfect spot to share a glass of wine in the late summer sun. Something I’m not likely to every get the chance to enjoy . I turn the blinds down and stand , slowly unbuttoning my dress, opening it wide and shimming it from my shoulder. stepping out of the fabric, I fold it neatly on the end table , then I start to go to work on my bra and panties , folding them and adding them to pile on the end table . I turn to your high back chair , the one you sit in when you want to watch me play and edge myself . not quite sure what to do for the best, I decided that kneeling at the side of your chair would be the best idea. So I walk to the chair and I start to lower myself to my knees, a sense of foreboding and sadness washing over me. I’m really having to fighting of tears and stamp down the sobs that are rising from some place deep inside.

again I’m so court up in my own little world, that I don’t hear you come in the room. The first I know about you being near me is a shocked gasp, the clatter of a tray being sat down and you saying ‘jesus Kallie, I said make yourself comfy , not get bare assed and kneel on the floor’

Lifting my face to yours , I look at you with a very confused look on my face. I stutter out ‘but I thought you wanted to ‘talk’ about stuff'” I feel the sob in my throat rising and tears stinging my eyes, ‘way to make a fool of yourself kallie’ . Looking at you face for some idea of what you really meant , I see you with a bemused grin on you lips and you head shaking . Feeling like a total idiot know I get up from the floor and make to grab my cloths and flee the scene of my shame. But your hand has my arm in a vise like grip, and your turning me to face you. That ‘s when you see the silent tear fulling down my face. all I hear before you fold me in to your arms is ‘fuck Kallie , no sweetie , no , I just want to chat with you about some stuff”

That just makes me sob harder and harder. Great I was right in the first place, you want to call all this off and send me away. I can’t seem to stop the tears or the sobs, but I also try to push my self free of your arms, as they are and your touch is not helping my addled brain to function. but your strong arms are not  letting go , you drag me over to the couch , sit down and host me on to your lap. tucking my head in to shoulder and making shushing noise while you stroke my hair.

when I’ve calmed a little , I whip my eye and blow my nose, wow I must look a mess. I try to stand up, but you’re not having any of it . “hold still missy! Your not moving till you tell me what the fuck all those tears  were for”

to tried to fight you, I relax , take a deep breath and start. ” I thought you called me here to tell me that I was being realised , but when you said get comfy , I thought you wanted to use me and play. So I thought I should be naked and kneeling, but then when you saw me you clearly didn’t  want that , so I felt not only a fool but realised my first thoughts were right , that your about to realise me, and … and…”

“shush little one, let me speak now ok ‘ You say in your firm but friendly tone. I nod , my head bumping under your chin. you hold me tight pull me closer, so I feel safe, little and warm.

You start talking again in a low , calm tone ” I asked you to come here today , as I have things I need to say to you . I did not ask you here for a booty call nor am I going to release you from anything little one. I wanted to talk to you about where we are headed and what future you see for us. I was going to say that not having contact with you for 2 weeks has been hell, that I missed your pretty little face, your cheeky chatter and could not stop thinking about your body and the things I longed to do to it . I was hopping you would say you felt the same and that you might want to take this a step farther. I was going to ask you to do me the honor of wearing my collar and become my sub. I know we have a lot to talk about still and a lot of things to work out but I was so hopping you wanted the same as me. So what is your answer Kallie , is a collar something you are interested in, my collar I mean, me as your Dom on a much more permanent footing?”

I sit stock still in your lap , my eyes are threatening to spill tears again. I open my mouth but no words will come out so I nod my head as hard as I can, bumping the underside of your chin again. I take a deep breath, swallow and finally find the words ‘yes , yes please , ever so much sir!’

With a chuckle you set me on my feet , stand up yourself and pull my into you and lean down and kiss me. soundly, full of passion and leaving me with no doubt that you’re in charge. it goes on and on , and I never want it to stop. but you pull away ,stroking my face with one hand and adjusting  yourself with the other, looking me in the eye the whole time, causing me to blush. You say in a soft and gentle tone’ now little one, I want you to kneel, close your eyes and hold your hair up and away from your neck, I’ll be right back , no peeking , promise?’

I nod and drop to my knees , gathering my hair up in my hands and closing my eyes tightly. I hear you walk in to the hall, rustle through a bag, take something out of it and then pad back me . You kneel behind me and then I feel you place something made of leather round my , it tightens and I can feel you buckling it closed . checking it’s not to tight, you tell me to open my eyes and let go of my hair. my hands fly to the thine strip of leather round my neck , I look up and begging with my eyes, you chuckle and help me to my feet , and I run to the hall and the mirror. I stare at the thin purple , kitten style , leather buckle collar , with a small sliver d-ring at the front and hanging from it is shiny, heart shape tag. with shaking fingers I catch hold of the tag, turning so I can read what is on it . It reads  Sir’s Little one. I cant help myself , I turn round , squealing with delight, I run back to the lounge and launch myself at him.

With my legs wrapped round his waist and arms round your neck, I cover your face I kisses, not realising that your hands are rubbing my bum and moving to my lower lips. Nor that you are walking towards the couch, then I come to just as my naked back hits the smooth leather . the next thing I know I’m rough turned over on to my tummy and then hosted over your lap. your growling at me to hold still. Then comes , in a husky voice ‘ Now little one I think you need to be punished for think the worst , before asking what I wanted to talk to you about , don’t you? hmm, I think 10 of the best on each should do it , now I want you to count little one and say thank you , do you understand?’

‘Yes sir ‘ I squeak and then gasp as I feel the sudden sting of his hand making contact with my bum cheek. ‘1 , thank you sir’ I manage to get out just before your hand makes contact with the other cheek. I count out loud, as the blows land on my bottom , one after another. then as soon as its starts it end and you pull to you for yet another cuddle, but I can feel your erection through your jeans. I look up at you , pleading with my eyes , uttering a ‘please’ , as I slide from your lap, coing to rest between your knees. Not brake eye contact , my hands move to your jeans , to the zip of your fly , slowly dragging it down.

“ok little one , show me what you want to do” you say as you pull your t-shirt up and over  your head , and tossing it to the floor. I pull you fly down, delighted that you have gone commando, tugging your jeans down your toned legs, tossing them to the side with your t-shirt . Then I turn back to you, steeling between your legs , looking to you to check it’s ok! You nod and smile, and I go to work!

Slowly kissing from the tip , down to the base, stopping to drop kisses, then gentle licks and sucks to you balls . I then lick from the base, along the underside , right back to head of your cock. It’s glistening with pre come, that I run my fingers through and use as a lubricant, as I gently pump your cock for a minute or two . But then I can’t wait any longer , sitting back on hunches I take the tip of your cock in my mouth , slowly taking you deeper and deeper in to my throat . Your hand has weaved their way in to my hair and you now decided to take control . Using. My hair, you control the depth and speed of things , leaving me to control how hard I suck and allowing my hands to tease your balls. Soon you stroke speed up, thrusting my face and mouth down harder. I feel you tense , and then with a deafening raw , your empty yourself in to my mouth and I swallow as much as I can . When you finish , you release you death like grip on my hair, and I come up gasping for air.

Still kneeling on the floor, red-faced , swollen lips , hair a mess and still panting. You hover over me and then host up in to your arms, kiss my soundly and cooing soft words in my ear. When my breathing returns to normal , you speak again. ” well little one I think we have an awfully to talk about and things to work out, that is if you still want too that is!?”

“Of course I do buster !” I giggle and playfully punch you in the chest . But it all gets lost in the look On you face . grabbing my arm , you stand taking me with you, only to stoop and gather me up in you arms, telling I need to be punished again , and with that your striding off.to your bed room with me in your arm. Knowing that we’re not done with talk just yer, but also the talking can wait, for now!

Masturbation Monday.

nee mm

From the heart, Poly life, social, Uncategorized

Day 6 of the Submissive's advent calendar, by Submissive guide – Awareness.

So today on the advent calendar the focus was on awareness of your submission. the was one simple question to ponder, When are you most aware of being owned / submissive. the was one activity for Owned subs and one for unowned subs. the activity for unowned subs was to focus on ways that they serve people. do you help friends and family out ? do you volunteer? what are you maple of and what are you willing to do? the activity for owned subs, was after thinking about when you feel most submissive , to then recall how it feel and what it looks .

sitting down and thinking about it when I feel my most submissive , the one thing that really reminds me I’m owned, is when I kneel at the side of the bed in the evening , and maître changes my day collar, to my leather kitten collar that I sleep in. in the morning , I kneel at the side of the bed and he changes it from my leather kitten collar , back to my silver chain collar. It is something we have done every day we have been together . He will come in from the hall , to find me and the girls if they are home kneeling at the side of the bed. we have are bedtime collar on are knees, eyes looking down. he will ask each of us in turn to sit up on are knees , holding are hair out the way , and will take off are day collar. We then pass are bedtime collar to him, and for the girls he will put it round their necks and buckles it. My bed time collar is ia little different to the girls as it is a locking collar. so he unlocks my purple padlock, puts it round my neck and then buckles and snaps the lock shut, and then orders me to hop in to bed!

it’s hard to describe how this makes me feel. It makes me feel loved , cherished and cared for . It makes me feel small , safe and proceed. It makes me proud to have earnt this collar. it also makes me feel very calm and peaceful in the evening, as it is a reminder that we are tucking in to bed , having are bedtime story and turning the lights out. In turn when it is changed in the morning it is kind of single that my day is starting , that I have my tasks and chores to do and that I need to work hard to make him proud.

the is also the times that it turns from a collar change in to something more. those are times when after he has changed my collar , and he weaves his fingers in my hair and hauls me to my feet. kissing me and leaving knowing who I belong to. he then chucks me on the bed and makes sure I don’t forget that my body belongs to him . and when his through doing that he cuddled me in to my safe place , spooning with my head resting on his shoulder , and reminds me who owns my soul!

So that was todays, lets see what the morning brings.

hugs,

Pixie x x x x

 

Diary, From the heart, Little, musings of pixie heart, Poly life, Uncategorized

Day 5 of the Submissive's Advent calender, by the submissive guide – The Music.

Hi, hello,hay! Well I’m up early and have hit the road running today! My uncle Fred is watching the babies while I have my English lessons. So I’m getting some help with writing this and get to have a lovely chat with a friend.

Today’s activities focus is Music and how affects you and how it inspires you . The first activity is to sit and listen to music that you love, then think about a few questions . The second is about finding a poem, or quote or single word that inspires you. Keeping it your pocket and thinking about it, and letting it inspire you. I chose the first , as music is a big part of who I am . It can effect my mood, make me smile or cry or laugh or make me horny as hell! I have quit eclectic tastes in music. I love Punk, metal and rock. But I also have a soft spot for rap and country. I will even admit to liking so pop music and even Abba. Not a huge fan of jazz or classical stuff , but they do have their place. but one of the biggest loves I have is for Folk, or should I say Irish Folk music that I was bought up on. No mater what I have going on or how I feel , Irish folk can cheer my soul, calm me down and make me feel grounded. Haha I guess I am more of traditional girl than I thought.

So the thing points:

  • How does music connect you to the world around you? Music is one of the things that can really effect my mood. I use it to help when I’m anxious  to help me stop focusing on the thing that is making me anxious. I can use it when I have a cry stuck, to make me cry. I use upbeat music start my day happy and full of energy. I guess it sort of feeds my soul!
  • Do you have a theme song? The boss man would say ‘right on time’ Cos I always have to be on time for things! but I think it would be ‘don’t take it personally’ by Monica or maybe ‘Savior’ By Destiny’s child. Cos I can be a little grumpy at times and cos I have been through some shitty times .
  • Thinking about when your playing with your partner/s or fantasize about doing so – is the there a play list in your mind? Yes defiantly! For D/s it has to be chilled and calm, with a slow beat and a melody . For fucking it has to be either slow and soft , if it’s romantic. Or if it is more intense or spontaneous , the has To be a stronger , faster beat.
  • Do you have a specific music you love to play to? What are they? why do you think they connect you to the moment? Well not specific songs , but bands like the kings of Leon, green day and nickel back. I think it’s cos they have songs that inspire me to dance and act a little naughty. I can then remember what I did to that song if it comes on the radio and then I get that sort of not in my tummy and blush at the memory of it!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

 

 

bdsm, family update, From the heart, Little, musings of pixie heart, Poly life, Uncategorized

Day 4 of the Submissive's advent calendar by submissive guide – Rewards for service.

Well Good Afternoon world! How are we all doing this fine and awesome day? I have been on a roll today. I got up did my yoga , Walked the hounds, did my neb and meds and ate breakfast, ok so that’s not the epic bit! maîtriser set me the challenge of going in to town , with the babies , on my own. So not to bigger deal really right? Well it was are first solo trip in to town on my own, I have really crippling anxiety at the moment and I have phobias of dirty places, public transport and pigeons. So for me it is a huge , huge fucking deal that I managed it! So as a reward I was allowed to buy Lego and have fries at McDonald’s !

That kind of leads us nicely in todays activities and their focus, which is based round rewards for service . The first activity was to think about what rewards you get and for what service you get them for. Not just in a submissive role ,  but as well as in your normal , every day life . the second was to write a plan or a list of what you want to achieve in the coming year. Both are majorly appealing to me , but for this post I did the first, as I’m on my own and I guess it’s easier, as any plans I make, would involve the girl and the boss man, and I can’t do that if they aren’t here!

So first thing I did was writ a list of things I do kinky and none kinky . on the none kinky list was: run the home, cooking , cleaning , washing and ironing. I run my own businesses and teach for another company .On the kinky side I look after maîtriser needs In anyway he needs me to, be that sexual or in a bdsm D/s sort of way. Him and I use consensual none consent , so I basically do as he asks, when ever he asks. It’s at this point I go , see he asks , not orders . I think the is a big difference between asking and ordering some one to do stuff. I mean yes he does it in a stern manner that makes me get all wet and horny , but he never shouts orders, he uses please and thank you and always heaps on the praise if I get something right. We have also in the last year changed and added in a care giver/little aspect and I have given him much, much more control over my day-to-day life. His also had me working on things like my self-esteem , my English , my confidence and my health. we also use reward charts, reward money and stickers. If I do all my chores and task for the day,  I get a sticker and £1 goes in my treat money tin. he will give me extra stickers for extra effort , and £1 for each one of them. I have to wait till the 1st day of the next month to open my tin and count the money. I can then save some of it if I want to buy something big or spend it if I want some little treats. It’s my money and as long as I spend it on myself and stuff that wont hurt me, I can do what I like with it! but one of the rewards I love the most are the words, cuddle and kisses I get from the girls, when they want to show how much they affricate what I do for them. The best one from the boss man is getting to spend time with him. Be it a 2 minute cuddle on a Saturday morning , or meeting at lunch time for a pub lunch , or the bath that he sits and reads to me. Other rewards I love Lego, books, stuffies, spa treats and anything to do with unicorns!

So that is my take on rewards for service, I wonder what tomorrow will bring!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

 

From the heart, musings of pixie heart, Poly life, social, Uncategorized

Day 3 of the submissive guides advent calendar for submissives – The wise words.

So today on are submissive advent calendar Words of wisdom that we have been given, found , or stumbled upon in are journey through life or in submission. how they have inspired us and stayed with us over time. The were 2 activities to day. The first was to sit and spend 5 minutes thinking of all the wise words you have received over the years. thinking about how the effect you and why they have stuck with you. The second was to take these wise words and turn them in to a holly bundle Christmas decoration. As much as I wanted to make the holly bundles , we have had a really busy day . We all went to mass , went a bought the last bits of are Christmas decorations , had a Lego building marathon , homework and babies to care for, so we did the first.

It was actually a really awesome way to spend 15 minutes of quiet time. I got to sit with a cup of tea, reflecting on the past and how it has shaped me as a submissive. we as a family , well us girls chose to kind of build on the idea , by listing them and chatting about while we cooked dinner. what was amazing , well I think was how we all had listed advice that we had got from each other and how they had affect us!

some of the words of wisdom I listed.

  • breath , just breath. keep moving forward, take baby steps if you have to but just keep moving, and just breath.
  • What make you weird and different , is you greatest strength.
  • in submission I find power.
  • It’s ok to not be ok all of the time.
  • The is nothing wrong with a good girl having a naughty side.
  • Love should never hurt , unless you want it to.
  • Don’t let the bastards grind you down.
  • Never under-estimate the power of a coy smile and shy eyes.

Well that was todays, cant wait to see what tomorrow brings!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x

musings of pixie heart, Uncategorized

Day 2 of the Submissive Guides Advent Calendar for Submissive's – The Token.

Today was about making a submissive token to help keep sight of your  submission in the busy holiday season. The to activities were making a physical token to wear or make a potpourri. The idea of the potpourri is to use the scent and to link it to your memories of your submission. now as much as the thought of this sang to me we could not do this one. Poor Kitten is really sensitive to scents and they can trigger her headaches. So instead we went for making a token.

I guess all of us already have signs of are submission that we wear all the time. We all have day collars and collars that we wear at different times. they don’t come off unless we have maîtres permission or it is a medical emergency. I ardour my collar and it is something that when I am not with maîtres and the girls , I take great comfort in and kind of draw courage from. my Day collar was hand-made for me and is really just a simple necklace, but maîtres put it round my neck and he is the only person who will ever take it off. (well ok I take it off if I have to , but I was meaning in a sort of D/s way!) My other collars have tag that reads mouse and a Purple heart padlock.

Back to our activity shall we?! We all cleared the kitchen table off , Kitten got are beads and bits from the work room, and we set about creating! we kind of all decided to make bracelets or anklets. Very simple , we chose a few beads , threaded them on cord and then notated them in to place. It was a great way to spend an hour or two. I had a chance to relax and unwind, which was something I really needed. So we are now wearing them and loving them. So we are now champing at the bit to see what tomorrow brings!

Hugs,

Pixie x x x x