From the heart, musings of pixie heart., Poly life, socail, Uncategorized

Me and my Collar.

Me and my Collar.
Collar within the BDSM and D/s scene can have many different meanings. From Protection and safety, to ownership and control, to love a devotion. They can be worn all the time, only when playing and sometimes only when with a the dominate. They can be a simple chain necklace, or a fancy ribbon collar to a more traditional leather buckle collar.

I am admittedly a little bit of a collar addict, as I love that I can have a different look or style of collar for different occasions. But I have 3 main types of collar I wear. Firstly, I have my day collar, that is worn most of the time. It is a simple silver chain that is joined in the front with a large sliver O-ring and a smaller silver on ring. The large O-ring represents Maîtriser and the smaller one is me, the are linked together like we are. I’m not allowed to take this off, unless it is a medical emergency. Next are what we call ‘Bedroom collars’. They are the ones I sleep in and wear if we are playing in the bedroom. They are simple ribbon and webbing collars that have a d-ring at the from and to larger ones at the back, that are used to close the collar, either with ribbon or a padlock. Maîtriser or Babe will change my day collar to my bedroom collar at bedtime and then back to my day collar when I get up in the morning. Lastly, I have my play collars. These are leather buckle collars. They are worn when ever we are playing outside the bed room, go to clubs, are around other kink friendly or when Maîtriser says he wants me to wear on. They all have locking buckles so one of my heart padlocks locks me in to them. The is a d-ring at the front that has one of my tags on it. My tags simply read Mouse, my pet name from Maîtriser. They don’t have owned or property of on them, as Maîtriser says he like people to know that I’m his willing submissive and that it was 100% my choice. 3 of my leather collars have spikes on then, this is my way of saying ‘yep I’ll talk to you but touch me without mine and maîtriser permission and I’ll bite!’ I also have a collection of charms and bells that I lave for my bedroom and play collar. The charms are to sort of change the look for my mood. The bells are for when I get in a strop and start stomping round. I get told to not make the bells jangle and in doing that calms me down. Although I do love the jingle it makes when I get fucked hard!

I have a few rules around my collars as well. They are:
• The only people allowed to change my collar are Maîtriser, Babe or Sir Beasty.
• I’m allowed to remove my collar if I must have treatment, scans, or medical emergency.
• I’m allowed to choose what collar, tag, charms, or bells I want to wear on my collar, but maîtriser must ok my choice and but the collar around my neck.
• I must not allow people to touch my collar without asking me and maîtriser first.
• When I’m having my collar changed I am to kneel and hold my hair out of the way.
• I can have an agree upon other change my collar or help me change my collar if maîtriser or babe are not with me.

My collar/s mean a lot of things to me. The are a sign of my submission, that I have a Dom and belong to him. It’s a sign that I am loved, protected, and cared for. It is some thing that brings me great joy and a sense of pride in myself. It makes me believe I am strong and that I am safe to be who I am. It is something that brings me a sense of calm and peace, and I draw strength from it. Lol my boss, who is kink friendly and knows I’m collared says, he can see how much my collar having has help me and how much it means to me. by the fact that when I stand up to teach or give a speech my hand goes straight to my collar.

Well that is little bit about my collars and what they mean to me. hope you enjoyed it!
Pixie x

From the heart, musings of pixie heart., Poly life, socail

Protectors, guides, and mentors.

So, a few months ago kink craft had an article and podcast about protectors and their role with in the kink community. (John brownstone and Kayla Lords were guest on the podcast). It was a great article and had excellent points. It got me thinking about my own experiences of ‘Protectors’ and wanting to know other options of them I asked on Twitte what others thought of them. Well that was opening a big old can of worms!

People have a lot of very strong opinions of them, both good and bad. The general opinion was that most people who offer to act as ‘Protectors’, are in fact abusive predators and should be avoided like the plague. That some responsibility needs to newbies in doing their own research and being as prepared as they can be. That ‘protectors’ have more of a mentor role. That Doms and Subs new to the kink scene Could use a Mentor or a guide. And above all, always stay ‘Sane. Safe and Consensual’.
I personally hate the term protector or protection. Those terms making me think of the mafia or a brand of condoms. However, I do think that the is a place of protectors in the kink world. Hell, I don’t just think it, I see it as the responsibility of people how have been in the life style for a while to keep an eye on newbies and stand up to people who are likely to course harm to them.

Thankfully the kink scene has a few awesome people who do keep an eye on newbies and keep the A-holes at bay.
My first personal taste of a protector was when I met kitten and she took me to my very first fetish club. I was only 18 and at the time very vulnerable. It was that night that she introduces me to her Dom, a fresh faced 34-year-old boss man. (aww I forgot he was that young once). He sat and chatted to me, pointing out things and explaining stuff. He also introduced me to all the trustworthy and friendly people and pointed out the people who I should avoided like the plague.

We as a family have from time to time acted as a sort of guide to newbies. Showing people around, introducing them to people, explaining term and etiquette. Also pointing the A-holes and wirdos. (I have a picture of sir Beasty going ‘WIRDOs’ and ROTFLMAO’)

Us girls also acted as what I guess you would call mentors, but I would call it more of a friend and being open and approachable. We have all been around and active in kink, on some level for a lot of years. (Babe has been for 21 years, but I’m not saying she is old, just mature, and sexy as hell). We will take newbie subs under are wing, answering questions, explaining things, sharing safe and informative rescores and inviting them to come to events with us. The Boss Man has also acted as a mentor many times. He first got in to kink and BDSM when he was 22 and is 53 now. (his sexy as hell though). He does pretty much the same as we do but will also teach or show them how to use floggers and canes and the like.

Now I’m going to share the reason babe actively act as a mentor / protector. On a night out in a club in London in early 2006 the was a newbie male sub, who was trying to get in with the hardcore mistresses who put on a great show and had these amazing sub, who were willing to do anything. Well to cut a long story short this poor guy took GHB and went on to have a bad reaction, now that is bad part. The good part was a very well known at respected female Dom saw what had happened, had her 2-male sub to calmly move him to the side, then took it on her shoulders to take care of this poor guy. Make sure someone sat with him, made him drink water, got him food, kept him warm and went as far as making sure he got home and that the was someone sober stayed with him till he was sober. It really impacts on babe in a big way. I think it is one of the ways that make Babe the way she is as a Dom.

I’m going to say here that as a family we believe that if People in the BDSM, kinky and fetish Scenes want to be seen in a positive manner, they sold act and play in a responsible, none judgemental way. So why would they not wanted support and encourage new people and offer them protection.

As with anything in are little family we do things a little differently, cos we are us. Maîtriser always says that our safety and well being is the most important thing in the world to him. But the are 4 of us at home and he only has one set of arms and one set of eyes. So, we have rule and regs to keep us safe and to give him peace of mind. Are rules being: No going out after 10pm on our own. No going to pubs or clubs on are own. If 3 of us are drinking, 1 of us must stay sober. No playing in clubs with out babe with us. If in doubt, ask yourself What Would Babe do. (WWBD)

We also have a list of real world and online friends that act as sort of protectors for me and the girls. They are known as ‘pre-agreed others’ and are listed at the back of are contracts we have with maîtriser. The are there to keep an eye on us, but we can also turn to them for advice and guidance if we need it. This was added to are rules, not because he does not trust us. But we have had issues with other people in the past and we all wanted to feel as safe as we can be. The list is full of people that us girls and maîtriser feel we can trust totally

For me the whole safety thing has been huge part of my recovery from Domestic violence and has helped me to rebuild my life. I sometimes think people might see it as me going from one controlled relationship to an even more controlling relationship. But 80% of my rules are there at my asking. They are there to make me feel safe, and thus keeping me happy and healthy. Some of my rules: Who I can and can’t talk to. The amount of contact I have with my family. Social media, email and phone checked when ever maîtriser asks and that my blog is co by Sir Beasty. I asked for these as when I get sick I ide things and with these in place, the slightest sign that I’m getting sick, the boss man will step in and stop it getting worse.

So that is My thoughts and take on things. What works for me and the family, may not work for you, but it works for us. What I will say is you should always do your research, take your time to think, don’t rush. Stay sane, safe, and consensual. be careful who you trust. If something feels wrong in your gut, trust it, and remove yourself the situation. But above all safety first!

family update, From the heart, musings of pixie heart., Poly life

Endless Possibilities – Being part of an open poly family.

So, I was sat moaning to poor Sir Beasty, about not having anything to write about and how I was one post short for my seven I needed to post this week. He said, ‘write about the possibilities of being in an open poly family’. (I think he may have been fed up with my moaning). But it hit me, I talk endlessly about the D/s side of are little family, but not so much the poly side of things. So, liking Besty’s idea a great deal, I decided to write about it!

Now first things first I guess I should explain are ‘Family’ dynamic a little. Well briefly the is 1 straight man living with 4 bi-sexual women. (I know he is a lucky man). At home we all classes each other as partners and we are pretty much equal, but we do also have are D/s side and that will always be part of a poly side as well. All of us girls are sub to the boss man and we are pretty high on the old protocol side of things, so of course this plays in to are poly dynamic. I’m also going to say that we do not class are selves as swingers. For us playing with people or fucking is not something we can do with out feeling an emotional connection with someone. Don’t get me wrong the is nothing wrong with swinging, but it’s not for us. (your kink is not my kink and that is ok)

Now leaving the boss man out of things for a minute, I’m going to explain us girls dynamic and how it fits in to the ‘Family’ When it comes to playing and sex. Babe is the family switch, she dates people away from the family, but is also a driving force behind a lot of are fun and play at home. Kitten, Little Bear, and myself are subbie with her and she is kind of second in charge. Kitten is sub and is free to date and play away from the family, but Babe and Maîtriser have the right to step in and stop her doing so if they think that it is harming her mental health. Little bear does Has a Daddy/ fences but is also Sub to maîtriser and Babe. She can date and play away from her family but chooses not to at the moment. Then the is little old me, I’m married to maîtriser and his sub. I don’t date outside of the family and I don’t play or fuck anyone else without maîtriser or babe being with me (ok so I can play with kitten and little bear). I do this through choice and not because of rules. It’s more the fact that I draw strength from having them with me and I feel more relaxed with them with me.

Us girls Go on are Girl dates and this is where we get to have some fun! We all love flirting, teasing, and getting phone numbers. We can kiss who ever we want as long as we have the other girls in sight. But the is no taking people home or disappearing outside. If we are drinking, someone (normally me or Babe) stays sober, just in case. Maîtriser says when we go for a ‘Big ‘night out it’s like we are hunting in a pack and the men and women of where ever we are going should watch out!

At home we fuck and play pretty much when and where we want too! If we ask maîtriser first. We also have people who join us in are kinky fuckery from time to time. In kind of a kinky sleep over (I don’t like the word orgies, they sound kind of dirty). The girls can also have people stay over, if they let us all know first, if they play safe and if the person understands and Is respectful of are set up. We also have rules around play and sex. We always stay safe, sane, and consensual. We don’t play if we don’t want to or don’t feel like it. If we bring anyone else in to playing with us, we all must agree. But above we never make each other feel awkward if we don’t want to play.

We also invited people to join us in D/s senses as well. Normally Dom / Switch males who don’t mind following directions, And Dom women who can do the same. We also have a lot of playmates who are Sub female, who’s Doms let them join in are fun and games. Now I mentioned ‘as long as they can take direction’ bit, well this is because Maîtriser is a big old vouarist and loves telling people what to do us girls. (one of the reasons he is known as the boss man). So, when we have others in sense with us he is normally sat at the side, getting his rocks of to us playing to are hearts content. The fact that we all have very naughty exebishunest streaks means that we a happy to play like this and make him proud.For me on a personal level, I find playing with other amazingly good for my self-esteem, but I need to know the person first and need to trust them. My ex would bring other women and men home and expect me to want to fuck them, but now I get to bring people I want to screw in to the mix and I can say no whenever I want. I prefer Maîtriser or Babe with me and I love being told what to do. But that is more my submissive side than anything else. Oh, and I am always looking for new playmates!

So, to us being part of an ‘Open’ Poly family really does hold a world of possibility’s and we love the little, twisted family that we are. So that is my take on it! What does Open mean to you?
Pixie x

From the heart, Letters from the heart.

Letters from Maîtriser….

Maîtriser Loves setting me little tasks and jobs from time to time. They can be pretty much anything, from a fact-finding mission, to edging, to planning a special dinner for one of the girls or going and doing something new that is well out side my comfort zone. I adore doing things like that, truly I do. But sometimes they can push me a little too far and hard. Then I must stop and ask if we can ‘tweak’ them or if I can have help doing them. When this happened in the past I would beat myself up and think I was failing and letting him down. Maîtriser would tell me no, you’re not failing, over and over. But for me it was hard to take what he was saying on board, to trust it and believe it. Abuse and bulling in my past had left their mark not just on my body, but on my mind as well. So, he looked for ways to let me know he really did mean it. He knew that I have a love of letters and the written word, so he sat down and wrote me a letter. It was not long or full of declarations of his undying love. No, it was simple, to the point and straightforward. But it meant the world and did the job. I think it meant so much, as he took time out to write down his thoughts in way that made it clear to me that I was enough. It was also something that I could keep and look at every time I felt like I was failing, and I still do. I look at it and I’m filled with a warm mushy glow, a feeling that I’m doing a good job and that I’m enough. This is a copy of the letter, I’ve translated in to English, as he also makes a huge effort to write in Gaelic.

Dearest Little Mouse,
I want to say how proud of you I am, you have done such a good job of sorting out things at home and the way you have handled the changes has blown me away. Little one I know how hard it has been, and it means so much that you asked me to help you with them.
What does make me sad is that you think I’m cross at you for asking for help. Why would that make me sad or cross little one? Is it not one of your rules to speak up and ask to change task or alter them if they are upsetting you or if you are struggling with them? The Same goes for asking for help, I know it is so hard for you to ask for help. For to long you had to things by yourself and bare louds that were too heavy for one person to bare on their own.

The fact is it makes me prouder that spoke up and came to me for help. IT does not make you weak or less of a person for doing that. In fact, knowing how hard it was for you do that and you being a good girl and following your rules, well that take a lot of strength my darling, so much strength. You did with your head held high, not a sign of fear or shame. So why are you beating yourself up now my little mouse?
If anyone should be beating them self-up for anything, it should be me. For putting to much at once on your shoulders and not seeing yours were struggling. So, stop be mean to yourself and be proud of what you have done and just how far you have come.
And Mouse remember, your enough, your loved and you are mine.
All my love, always and forever,
Maîtriser

This is why I love him so much!

Hugs,
Pixie x

From the heart, musings of pixie heart., socail

A year in the writing.

A year in the writing.
Last week my blog turned a year old! Most people who blog seem to do a giveaway or celebrate big time. Well with things being a bit rough over the last few weeks, I sort of for got about it. Maîtriser and the girls didn’t forget about it. I got loads of little presents form the girls and Maîtriser let me cook a big family dinner, with chocolate rice pudding for afters. But I’m still a little bummed that I did not really mark it, I mean it for me has been a big step and huge achievement for so many reasons. It has meant that I have been able to share my thoughts, get things out of my head and breath. It started out with me wanting to share goes on in my family in a positive light, but it quickly became so much more. I found that I like writing and I love the fact I can be creative in ways I never thought I could be. It has gone from being something I enjoyed doing, to something that I feel I need and want to do more of. I have made friends, ginned confidence and no longer feel like I need to hide who I really am.
I have also learned stuff about writing that I simply had no idea about. I mean dear god where was I when other people were learning about this grammar and punctuation crap? Sentence have rules and regulation? Proud to say that my spelling is better, I turn my grammar and spell check on now and I write in English now. Making a whole lot easier to post things that make sense to the public. Believe me writing in Gaelic and then translating it in to English is a pain in the bum, and not I a good way! But I’m going to share the things that I have learnt that have had the biggest impact on my writing.
Consistency is the key – I have gone from having no writing routine at all, to make myself sit down and write for an hour a day, to the point now that it is not a task but a habit. I have turned the box room in to a writing space, quiet, still, and warm. My little space to sit and write. I have also found that making myself blog at least once a week has help me fight some pretty harsh demon, that seem to like dancing on my self-esteem a lot. But it also keeps me connected to people and the outside world.
Edit like you mean it – looking back now over early blog posts I am shocked at how bad my spelling was and how badly edited they are. I have started for bigger pieces started using and editor (Aedan O’Healy). His got me doing Self editing thing that means I read it, reread it, and read, then post it. So now my work looks heaps more professional!
Plan, plan and plan some more – Ok so I am in my Realtime life a habitual planner. I love sitting down with a planner and getting things in order. I find it calming and helpful with my day to day life. But planning out something I’m going to write is so helpful and keeps me on track with what I’m writing. It has curbed my waffling and rambling, leading to me writing faster and with less fluff that was not needed.
Connect with other bloggers and readers – the sex blogging community, for the most part is amazing, and I love them. They have been a source of inspiration and encouragement. As have people who read my blog, I find it hard to get my head round the fact that people give a crap about what I write. I really do feel blessed to now have so many epic friends in my life!
Memes, Such fun! – So, the are loads of super fun kinky writing memes out there, Masturbation Monday, Kink of the week and Wicked Wednesday. They are great fun to take part in, et the creative juices flowing and inspire some Smutty writing! They have also got me thinking out side the box, working to limits and sticking to a dead line!
Find your spot, be unique and be yourself – So the biggest thing I have learned, is that I have a spot in the blogging world, that I am in lots of ways unique and that people like me when I’m just me! I can inspirer to be like people and like what they do, but I can’t be them and that is ok, cos they can’t be me either!
So that is what I have found after a year of blogging, shall we see where the next year takes us?

Hugs,
Pixie x

family update, From the heart, musings of pixie heart., socail

The people in my life.

The people in my life.
For anyone who follows me on twitter or my blog will have heard me talk about the people in my life and how much they mean to me. They are what keeps me going at times and are by enlarge what makes me who I am. I have written a little about them in the past, but never any real detail and I feel I should, I mean it feels rude not to really, they are simply to rade not too!

Maîtriser/ Boss man/ Tony: My Dom and Husband, he is also my Care-giver / Big and the sadist, to my masochist side. He has been my Dom for almost 5 years and we have been a couple for 4 and half years (long story). We have been married for just over a year and have 2 tiny twin daughters, Connie, and Evie. He is big, rough around the edges and a Gentleman. His tough kick boxing diamond, who has a hidden softer side. Clever, Funny, witty, and talented guy, who has a bad habit of sing Justine Bieber. (are little girls light up if JB comes on the radio). Best father and husband in the world in my eye and my hero.
Babe: Switch/ maîtriser second. Strong, practical, down to earth. Beautifully than words, Very clever and extremely funny. She is my Female Dom, who I do everything she tells me the first time, without fail. She is the meaning of the word sadists and Queen of ropes! She is possibly the bravest person I now, she will call maîtriser out if she thinks he is being to harsh or is wrong (yes, Doms can be wrong sometimes). Some people would say she is moody and rude, but she just does not do BS and calls a spade a spade.
Kitten: My best and oldest friend in the whole flipping world. Strong, funny, sweet, and incredibly talented. She is stunningly beautiful and sexy as hell, even if she does not believe it. She is the family peace maker, she is the person I turn to when I don’t know how I feel or don’t understand what is happening. She has a way of calming down, when I don’t know why I’m angry. She is my partner in crime, tag-team Buddy, and my nap time mate. I Love my Kitten.
Little Bear: The family’s Little/ Brat. Super cute, sweetheart, funny and possibly a little crazy. She brings out my protective and maternal side. Prone to bouts sulking and extrema brattiness. Obsessed with anything pink, purple, fluffy or sparkling. She has Daddy/ Faience as well as the boss man. She is also sort of the family social director and party planner. She is my chef snuggle bunny and little-space buddy!
Emit: One of my oldest and best friends. He a wardrobe master, working in New York. Someone I have and always want to know. We have both gone through and fought back from Domestic abuse. A dresser in a theatre. Smart, funny, charming, and cute as a button. He is my subbie shopping partner and my chef cheer leader!
Sir Beasty / Aedan O’Healy: Friend and protector. Tough guy with a squishy fluffy side. Witty, clever and has a way with words.one of very few people I trust 100%. My editor, sounding board and giver of advice. We trade friendly insult, cheeky banter and reminisce about Ireland. He has written permissions to tell me to hush, stop sassing and to behave. He has a really weird way of knowing what I’m thinking before I do!
Big Steve: The big tough guy in my life! (his 6ft 5). But is a total sweet heart who make me smile and never has a bad word to say about anyone! He is our personal trainer and he can push us as hard as he wants to and is even allowed to set punishments if we misbehave. (the worst I’ve ever got is legs and arms in the same day). but he is also the one who can get me to open and to make me cry when I get really stressed and need some relief. Top hugger ever!

Masturbation Monday

Caught in the act – part 3

 

Conner pushes me gently over the thresh hold of his room and shuts the door firmly behind him. He pulls out the chair form his desk and urges me to sit down upon it. He sat himself down on his bed, arranging the pillows behind him and making himself comfortable. grapping hold of the hem of his black t-shirt and pulling it up and off in one clean move, tossing on the bed beside him, and then tucking his thumbs in the waist band of his short. “Jo your one stunning girl, but your bundled up like a nun really isn’t that inspiring you know. Do a guy a favour and flash some flesh, will you?” His says in a horny tone that make me smile, even though I feel like I might throw up at any second.
“what do you mean by inspiration and how much flesh do you need to see” I reply in a quiet shy voice and not daring to make eye contact with him.
“Use your imagination babe” he retorts in a rough tone.
My eyes flick up to his, to be met by his smiling face and eyes, burn bright with desire. I let out a calming breath and reach up to my hair, pulling the pin that had been doing a bad job of restraining messy curly red locks. I shake my head a little and run my fingers through the tangle. “how’s that? I ask
“Good start but keep going” he replies with a grin. So, I stand and pull my hockey shirt over my head and let it drop from fingers to the floor. Then I push my yoga pants over my hips and down my legs, wriggling free and stepping g out of them. I adjust my thong panties, I return to the chair, this time perching on the edge, hold eye contact with Conner the whole time.
“is that better?” I ask, and it met with a very enthusiastic nod of his head, that sent a jolt of electricity through my core and leaves me with tingling toes and a suddenly wet pussy. I laugh and say, “Well I seem the one taking my clothes off here, don’t you have something to be getting on with?”
He grins widely and shakes his head with silent laughter. “Little eager aren’t we, been awhile?” he says, and I nod and blush. His thumbs slowly pull his short and boxers down to relive the rippling muscles of his stomach, the thick dark hair and then a very satisfying cock. “are you sure you can handle this?” he says and points to his cock, that is so hard it is standing clear from his stomach.
I Signer and say, “I’m not the one who’s going be handling it, but I’m sure going to enjoy watching”. as I stare him gently stroking his length.
“better loose the panties and bra then” he says.
I stand up and reach behind and unclasp hooks holding my blue lace in place, and with a role of the shoulders it falls to the floor. Then I hook my fingers in my panties and shimmer my way out of them. as I’m about to sit back down I notice that his hand has stopped moving “hay buster, you have a job to do!” I chide him.
“Well you see I never got to see you come, and that seems mighty unfair to me” he quips back at me with a cheeky grin and deadly serious look in his eyes.
“what you want to see me make myself come, while your making yourself come?” I ask in a sort of shocked amusement”

“Well I would much rather it was my cock that was making you cum, but I’ll settle for what I can get” his says and settles back and gets back to job at hand.
“what you want to fuck me?” I say in a shocked gasp.
“for fucks say jo, of course I do. Your stunning, funny and whip smart. What would I not want to fuck you? What do you think all the flirting has been for?” he growls at me.
Wide eyed I reply with “but I thought that is how you are with all women, I thought you were being friendly.”
It’s met with a snort of laughter “So pretty, so clever and yet so slow on the uptake. If you don’t get that pussy over and start fucking me, then I might start wondering why I’m So attracted to you”
My mouth opens and closes for a few seconds at his words, and then I manage to get out “I still want to see you come”
“well you better get on with the job in hand yourself jo” he growls, his hand still stroking his member. With that I decided to just let go of my self and just go with the moment. I spread my legs, on tip toe. Run my hands, down my neck over my breast, tweaking my already hard nipples as I go. Then carry on down over my stomach, my hip and then slowly part my lips. Using one hand to hold them open I use the other to fuck myself for a few minutes and then feeling the tension building in my stomach, I start to rub my clit, building up the pressure till I can’t hold back any more. My head goes back, my eyes close and I let out a prolonged groan of pure excites. I have never come that quickly or hard at my own hands ever before.
Floating back down to earth my eyes open and expecting to see Conner on his bed, I get a shock when I find him standing over me. The next second his pulling me to him and in to a fierce kiss. Then he’s spinning me round, kissing and biting my neck. his big hands a grouping my tits roughly and in a gravelly voice his saying “tell me this ok jo, foe god sake “
I nod that its ok and get thrown on the bed. He reaches inside this night stand, grabbing and condom, tearing it from the packet and rolling it over his cock. Then his body is back, covering mine and pulling me to him. then he plunges in to me I one stroke and then his thrusting in to me with a power I have never felt before. Then he gets faster, and I know his climax is close, but I’m not quite there yet. he pulls out, flips me over, plunging back in to me and then reach a hand round the front and using his thumb he rubs my clit hard and fast. Its enough to set me off and he follows my, coming with a roar in my ear, slamming in to me one last time.
Moments later he roles off me and throws the used condom in the bin. I sit up and say, “where the fuck did that come from”
With a smile he pulls me back done to the bed and kisses again, in a possessive way. He say’s “no idea, but things are going to have to change round here. Cos, I need to do it again and I feel I neglected parts of you. So, Roommates with benefits or something he says. all I can do is nod in agreement as his hand start to fondle my breast. “good cos I think these could do with a little attention, don’t you? And he starts to mull my breast and nipples and all I can do is moan in agreement.

caught in the act part 1

caught in the act part 2

Masturbation Monday.

 

Masturbation Monday, musings of pixie heart., socail, Uncategorized

Caught in the act – Part 2.

Second part to Caught be the act… (part 1)

My eyes lock with Conner’s for a couple of seconds before I can shake myself out of my daydream. realising I’m nearly naked in front of my house mate, with a boob out and my hand in my panties, I immediately blush from head to toe. Picking up the Tv remote, I fling at his head. Sitting up straight, I make a bolt for the safety of my bedroom. Shouting “get out Conner “as I go. Not stopping till I reach my room and the door is closed and locked behind me.
Then the is gentle knocking at the door and Conner’s voice say “Come on Jo, we need to talk about this. I get in my bed, hiding under the covers, holding a pillow over my head trying to block out the tapping at my door and Conner’s pleading for me to come out and talk to him. “Jo don’t be a twit, come on let’s just talk about it! I sit up, with a humph. “please just Go away Conner’ I get out, through the shame filled tears that have started full.
After he finally leaves, I creep out and turn the tv off, grabbing some snacks and then decided to hide in m bedroom for the rest of the weekend, in case he comes back wanting to ‘talk’ Saturday pass with me only leaving my room only to pee or get food and drink. Sunday pass the same, with the add extra of a very quick shower, cos I was staring to smell. Sometime after 11pm I wake up with a growling stomach and raging thirst. I slowly open my bedroom door and peek out to see if the is any sign of Conner. Then I creep down the hall, past his door and in to the kitchen, glad to of made it and glad his not back from his trip.
Then just as I round the corner in to the lounge, I walk straight in to the solid wall of naked muscle that is Conner’s chest. Smacking in to it, I quickly step back with a slight wobble, that Conner corrects with his strong arms gripping my forearms. I look up to say thanks and he can let go now. Only to be told to shush and listen.
“Jo it’s totally naturel you know, everyone does it. “He says in a calm steady tone.
“what You have been caught pleasuring yourself on the sofa by your house mate have you” I shoot back at him” my mortification complete.
“well no, but then I always go some place privet to pleasure myself” he says with a smirk on his handsome face. “But then I’ve never thought about setting up camp on the sofa and just going at it”
His words make me blush, as my head is filled with pics of sat on the sofa, naked and stroking his cock, till he comes. I giggle and let out a sigh. “so, we good now?” he asked with a warm smile on his face.
“I guess so, but I feel at a disadvantage here. I mean you’ve seen my boobs and ….” I get out before he cuts me off before I can finish.
I saw one really nice boob” he say’s adding “What do you want me to do to even it up Jo, whip my dick out and start wanking in the kitchen?” he says with a tone full of humour, but now all I can think about is how much I want to see his cock. I meet his eyes with a shy nerves smile, blushing from head to toe. “Is that it Jo you want to see my Cock?” he asks
Blushing even harder, if that is possible, I croak out a “Yeah, I really want to see Your Dick”
Laughing and shaking his head, he says “fine, but once this is over, we are going back to normal ok? Grabbing my hand in his and dragging to his bed room he casually adds “I’m Going to need a little inspiration though”

 

Masturbation Monday.

Masturbation-Monday-badge-1

family update, From the heart, musings of pixie heart., Uncategorized

New year, Better me!

New year, Better me!
Well 2017 is gone and I find myself in a reflective mood. For a lot of people, I know 2017 was not the best of year. With loss, illness, big ass storms and Donny-j. For me it was full of lows and highs. It was the year my daddy got sicker, my mother was diagnosed with cancer, I lost friends and family and my depression and anxiety decided to kick me in the butt. But it was also a year of great personal growth for me. I found my fit as a wife, blogger, and feminist. But by fair the best thing of 2017 was becoming a mother to my beautiful twin girls. I know a lot more to life that being a mum, but when you have thought for many years that it is something you’re not going to get to do. Well when you do, it blows your mind. I never knew I could love something so deeply and fiercely as I do them.
I have seen loads of people posting their new year resolutions, but you won’t be seeing any from me. We don’t make them, as maîtriser thinks it away of setting yourself for an unnecessary fail. What we do is sit down and make a list of targets and goals we want to work towards and plan how we can achieve them. it’s something we do every 3 months and we cover pretty much every aspect of are lives. Even maîtriser does it and will let us set goals for him! We sat down on Friday last week and did are lists. This is where I admit that I love the whole planning side of this. I get to get all my gel pens and stickers out. It’s really good fun!
Some of my goal for the next 3 months are: Loose the last of the baby weight and 15lbs extra, run my dogs at crufts, attend eroticon, pitch some ideas at other blogs, do my muck run training, more swimming lessons and get my new and improved blog up and running!
Maîtriser has also sat down with my and we have set some goals for my blog. Such as post a min of 3 times a week, keeping up to date with emails and upping the number of followers to my blog. Lol one of my friends got me a bloggers journal and a diary that is designed for people who have autism, that have been amazing. They are fun, clear, easy to use and don’t feel like they are shouting at me. So, yay!

I have also decided that I want really work on my English. Not just writing, but spelling, grammar, punctuation and understanding. This came about after several nasty comments about my spelling and grammar. I’m dyslexic and have Anxious ADD, so that makes learning and understanding really flipping tough at times. adding to this I grow up speaking a mix of Irish Gaelic and Russian you can see why English is something I have ongoing struggles with it! But I have Bob my English tutor tailoring lessons for help with this. Also, Sir Beasty is stepping in to help with editing my work, so it’s a case of bring it on!

So, as I wave good bye to 2017, I’m hitting the ground running in 2018, so bring it 2018!

Hugs,

Pixie x

bdsm, Diary, From the heart, Poly life, Uncategorized

Reading, thinking and 1 to 5 –

Last night (Sunday) after maîtriser told me new rules / punishments, I was sat thinking about them and the #SoSS  post on twitter. One of the things I have to do this week is read at least 3 blog post a day and then discus them with either maîtriser Or Babe . I had an idea, I love the blogs I follow , but I sometimes get a little overwhelmed by the amount of awesome post , I mean the are so many of them , where would I start! Then I had a light bulb moment , why not use the #SoSS posts! then I get help picking what to read and I know I’m reading the cream of the crop! So I asked maîtriser if I could do that and it was met with a smile, nod of his head and kiss. The fact he said ‘that’s   a good girl , think outside the box, I’m so proud of you’ was a huge bonus! (:

So yesterdays #SOSS was the Lovely and very talented Candysnacthreviews . I chose to use her #SoSS candy’s pick and mix 4. Just want to say that as always it was beautifully written and layer out I an extremely inviting way.

Getting Lucky – Scandarella – Story Written for Masturbation that is so hot I may have had to calm myself down , twice! Beautifully written , great visualisation and exquisite use of language. Love every second of this and I even read it to the girls as a bedtime story last night!

Crying after sex:two stories – Girl on the net. – Such a relatable piece of writing , that was so emotive that I had a lump in my throat and by the end I had tears streaming down om y checks. I think that anyone who has ever suffered with depression or anxiety well of felt this and this just sums up those feelings so perfectly.

Living With Invisible Bisexuality When You Look Hetero – Cara Sutra – Yet another piece that I could whole heartedly relate to! Being bi and poly myself , I look for the best like a normal(ish) hetro female. I had never stopped and really thought about it that much before, but I do. it also kind of makes why people are so shocked when they see me and kitten or little bear kissing in public! Thus really made me stop and think about it

Rosie Heart – Why i love doing sex work (and why it should’t mater) – A very thought-provoking and genuinely moving piece of writing . It made me look at sex workers in a different light completely (not that I looked down on them or anything like that) Really loved this and will be reading more of her stuff!

The Oooh Review!!! Leatherette Vixen Full Body Harness Review – Really awesome review of a product that not only made me want to try it , but made think ‘ I really want to review stuff, I just don’t have the guts!’ So bravo!

I also have to do as punishment my nana’s 1 to 5 thing . Which always makes me smile , even when I don’t want too!  So here we go with that.

Bad / crappy thing or thought – My sisters think I’m mad for not wanting to share a nanny with them and cos i would rather uncle fred or the girls watched the babies.

Good things.

  1. I manged to go get my blood work done without freaking out or fainting. I took the babies with me and walk to the hospital (3o min walk) and got the bus home.
  2. I have applied to do start my writing class again in the new year, for 2 hours on a thursday morning. maîtriser can work from home one day a week and has agreed to watch the girls for a morning.
  3. I have finally got my Christmas baking sorted out and have a kitchen full of christmas cakes!
  4. i have scheduled 5 post on this blog for this week. (well i think i have but you never know with me!)
  5. I feel much happier in myself after getting back to doing yoga and meditation every morning. i also cant wait to get back to the gym this week, even if it’s only core work and cardio!

W